Don’t Blame Yourself

Seriously… I’ve been there, I am there… PCOS has caused me to hate myself, to blame myself, and sometimes I’m sure it caused my husband to blame me…

The truth is… YOU are not to blame… Your BODY has failed you! You’re amazing whether you know it or not! But sometimes our bodies just fail us. It’s NOT your fault. Yes I know it’s hard to understand… hard to process but seriously don’t blame yourself. You can’t control that part of your body, that’s like thinking you can control if you’re born a girl or boy when you’re conceived. It’s taken me years to realize this… and I STILL struggle with it. If you’re a partner, don’t blame your partner for this… as the person effected by PCOS I can tell you that I put enough pressure on myself and my body. I beat myself up regularly because I suffer with PCOS. Not being able to get pregnant at the drop of a hat is enough suffering I put myself in. Watching my friends and family have children of their own, announce their pregnancies, record their gender reveals, post new born pictures… that’s enough pain I subject myself to… I don’t need your pressure, I don’t need you to rub it in, I don’t need you to blame me because he’s, it is my body… but I can’t just snap my fingers and make it happen. That’s the truth. It’s hard enough dealing with it on my own. I’m hard enough on myself! Please understand that this isn’t easy… it’s hard… it’s hard to be in the 10% who struggle, who are different, and yet are sometimes the ones who truly deserve to be a parent. Honestly, have you ever thought about that? Some of the people having kids left and right (like seriously a guy sneezes on her and she’s pregnant!) are the ones who are on welfare, can’t hold a job, and/or don’t contribute to society… but I was taught that the best things are the hardest to get, they’re different from everything else, and they’re worth the wait. While I know it’s hard to hold the faith… it’s hard to keep the positivity alive.. sometimes it’s the best thing you can do. Trust me, I’m writing this and saying it out loud to myself. You’re not alone… I’m in your shoes walking side by side with you… and I completely understand what you’re going through! We have to stay proactive and keep the hope! We got this babes!